"Don't Take My Word For It"

If you're a trainer like me, how often do you take a reality check on the theories you present to your trainees?

Some years ago, I read the case of George Turklebaum, a New York print worker who had died at his desk in Manhattan and because of his normal work habit of arriving early and leaving late, none of his colleagues had noticed for 5 days. Since George also lived alone, nobody else had noticed or reported his disappearance from home.

I remember using the story of George Turklebaum in my regular newsletter as evidence of the growing lack of humanity in our workplaces.

Needless to say, I was fairly red-faced when the emails started pouring in to tell me that the story of George Turklebaum was nothing but an urban myth, totally untrue in fact if true in other respects.

That's why I now run reality checks before every course I give just in case there are similar stories lurking there that I have come to accept as true.

Here are 3 that I now think twice about before using them.

1. The Communications Myth

This is ascribed to communications expert George Mehrabian who said that 7% of our communication comes from our words, 38% from how we say it, and 55% from our body language when we say it. I now have some concerns over the figures even if I accept the premise.

2. The Presentations Myth

This one comes from the Sunday Times Book of Lists and suggests that the greatest fear that people have is standing up to speak in front of an audience. It even outranks the fear of flying and the fear of death. Since only a tiny proportion of us ever have to give a presentation, while all of us face death, and many of us take air flights, this one just has to be an exaggeration.

3. The Change Management Myth

The third urban myth is the suggestion that I often use on Change Management courses to explain the complex nature of change. It's the theory that the beating of a butterfly's wings in Mexico can change the climate of New Zealand. Like most urban myths, this holds a grain of truth that can be both illuminating and instructive. But, when you consider the facts rather than the premise, it is palpably untrue.

Of course, like most trainers, I'm rather attached to my urban myths. Like a good and relevant anecdote, they can convey a truth in a way that theories can't. They're stories that coach, but still only stories.

So, how do I go about insuring myself against claims of false story-telling? Well, I have found a disclaimer that I'm thinking about getting everyone who comes on my courses to accept before they come. Here it is.

"Do not believe in what you have heard; do not believe in the traditions because they have been handed down for generations; do not believe in anything because it is rumoured or spoken by many; do not believe merely because a written statement of some old sage is produced; do not believe in conjectures; do not believe in that as truth to which you have become attached by habit; do not believe because of the authority of your teachers and elders. After observation and analysis, when it agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and gain of one and all, then accept it, practice it and live up to it."

This piece of advice is an excellent way of still putting out your theories while getting people to think about them carefully before using them.

The quote is ascribed to the Buddha who lived from 568 BC to 488 BC. But, like urban myths, don't take my word for it.